Memories Don't Live Like People Do . . .

. . . they'll always remember you.
Whether things are good or bad,
you've got your memories . . ."
-The Mighty Mos Def 'Travellin' Man'

Okay, so King Slick and I were reminiscing about actions past and their relations to current events* the other night and it's led me to think of a few things:

Number One: I always say that you should not regret past actions and I say this for a few reasons. First of all, there is NOTHING you can do to change those actions, they've happened and it's over. My mother always told me that "You can make ANY decision that you want, but you can NOT choose whether or not you will accept the consequences of that decision." The best you can do after having made a decision and having acted on it is deal. I also feel that for the most part, decisions were based on who we were when we made that decision. Of course we mature and change and grow etc. but you did what you did with what you had, no more and no less.

Number Two: Most older people that I know have told me at one point or another that I should do any and every thing. They always add some form of "When you get my age you spend more time worry and thinking about the things that you didn't do." Is this just a license to act a fool while you are young? Is this why you can see older black men walking around in the summer wearing shorts and socks pulled up to their knees and misusing current slang? I give these guys a pass just because. I figured that they have earned it. Old black men everywhere, please take note that I am not talking greasy about you for wearing flamingo print shorts and a Fubu Jersey (although that is some silly shit!!!)!!

Number Three: Do people, at their base, really change?? That great Negro poet Shawn Carter once opined "You can change, but that's just the top layer/ Man you was who you was 'for you got here . . .". I know all of the cliches of leopards not changing their stripes and all but we all know someone that use to be a degenerate and is now "into the church". With all of the experiences that we have in life, do we really remain the same person?? Personally, I think that at the least, our perspective changes. Chuck D once opined that we should re-read our book collection every 5 years because our perspective has changed. This is valid for all media. If you take the movie Mo' Betta Blues. I really didn't understand this movie when it debuted in 1990. I got all of the major points and themes but I couldn't feel it. NOW!!! OH GOD! There are days that I think that I may call my forthcoming autobiography "The Halcyon Days of Yore: My Life As Bleek Gilliam".

All of this (and watching High Fidelity the other night) when added to my need to know stuff (I'm horrible sometimes, scratch that MOST times, I just NEED to know) led me to start thinking that maybe I need to start conducting exit interviews with dates, jumpoffs and girlfriends (King Slick I see you, I know that you're dying to create this, walk with me!!!). Why is this beneficial you may ask, well I guess we could start with closure. I've been told that my "deal with the here and now and if you ain't here I don't care" policy may not be the healthiest policy to have, so here is a way to remedy that. I can ask questions like:

At what point did you know it was over?
At what point where you over it?
Can I still beat? Are you sure?
Under what circumstances could I beat?
When did my still beat privileges run out? Are you sure?
What did you *really* like about us? About me?
What did you *really* hate about us? Me?
What do you tell the guys you're with now about me?
What, if anything, did you learn about yourself because of me?
Would you say that I had an overall positive or negative effect on your life? How positive or negative?
How would you rate dates and other activities?
If you had to rate me from 1-5 with one being Cheap-Ass and 5 being Ballers Baller, how would you rate me?
Does anyone work the twos half** as good as I do?
Can I beat any of your friends?
If I was actively trying to beat one of your friends, would you help, or hate?

There are a ton of other questions that I have but putting them all here could potentially corrupt results. Major companies do this all the time, why shouldn't I? There is major cost benefit analysis to be done here. I can also benefit by using this data to refine future recruitment and retention efforts!! Now usually I just take some time, a hiatus if you may, and consider these things but it's now the 21st century and I gotta get with the times. Who's with me to move this movement???

*(didn't I just make talking about bunnies that we did or didn't smash off sound all poetic and intellectual??)

**(let's be real, I am sure that the answer is no, but I can't be totally vain here now can I?)